I thought I'd make a post regarding this topic since it's come up a bit in my last few blogs (which most of you can't see so HA you're just gonna have to imagine), and kind of set the record straight on where I stand on the all-important subject of penis size.

First off, it is a wonderful thing to open a guy's pants for the first time and know you're in for a good hard breaking.  As women, one of our greatest fears is ramping up hotly to that moment of truth, unbuttoning a man's pants, and then mentally cueing that sad trombone sound:  wah-wah-wahhhhhh!  So when something springs out of that hallowed ground that almost frightens me, my first reaction is "oh HELL yeah" and then immediately "omg I can't wait to tell all my friends/LJ/Twitter this shit."  It's just a girl thing - we do that.  Sorry guys but there are no secrets where this is concerned; it's totally a sisterhood solidarity thing, and if you are markedly above or below average you can expect that all of your girlfriend's and ex-girlfriend's friends know about it.

However, beyond the madly-grinning shock and awe we are subject to as we get vaginally carpet-bombed that first time around, the truth is that when you get to the point where you have a chronic sore throat and vaguely period-like cramping more often than not (along with occasional minor bleeding if you have a ninja grappling hook/IUD installed in your uterus like I do), you start wishing that your boy was a little less blessed.  What is comes down to is this:  huge cock is rad for occasional weekend batterings, but outright uncomfortable on a daily basis if you're a small girl.

Almost all men with giant dicks have the same complaints.  They rarely get a good blowjob.  They can't fuck someone as hard as they want to without hurting them.  They can't put themselves in a girl all the way.  Anal is out of the question.  PersonaIly I am really fucking stubborn; I spent weeks teaching myself how to relax certain muscles, breathe differently and quite literally stretch out my throat muscles so that I could completely deepthroat David (which was a fucking feat if I do say so myself!).  I was successful, much to his almost virginal delight, but it was NOT a pleasant process for me.  Likewise I love rough sex and don't often complain because that's what ibuprofen and pillow-biting is for.  But damn, it does get to be a hell of a lot of battering so I can't blame other girls for saying "ouch quit it".  (and anal doesn't even apply in my world, ok)

I personally maintain that a decently thick, solid 7 inches - give or take half an inch - is the perfect size, big enough to smile over and look good but not quite Tokyo-decimating.  Anything more than that is going to end up being unpleasant if it's a regular thing.  Likewise, anything under 6 inches isn't going to keep me around for very long because really, wtf for?  I'm all about average to slightly over average and I think most women generally agree with me.  Why I've been recently blessed/cursed by men who obviously spent their formative years sticking their dicks into power lines and and masturbating with nuclear waste, I dunno.  I'm like "yay!" because it's certainly better than the opposite alternative, but I also cry inside a little bit...below my waist and above my knees.

I finished up all my plans for attending Comic-Con today. I have no idea how many of you are going, but I'll only be there on Saturday the 25th, then at the X-Sanguin afterparty Saturday night. I'll be at the Brotherhood's booth (#433) for the majority of the day but I will occasionally be stumbling elsewhere to get my gawk-n'-shop on.  Actually both Ana and I will be there together, so wewt.

If you're going, I highly suggest the X-Sanguin event...it's always been one of the year's best parties, in my opinion.


Tonight I'm heading into SF after work (all at the last minute, grumble) to meet up with my friend Zak, who is an artist and porn star of some popularity or so I hear.  He occasionally does sketch work that I'm really impressed by.  I guess he's doing a reading (he had a few books out) or something at a place called the Make Out Room tonight.  I'm not that familiar with his work...I just know him via our mutual friend Danielle Voltaire aka the girl formerly known as Voltaire Suicide (google that shit).  He looks like a scumbag but he graduated from Yale...which by itself doesn't mean that he is not a scumbag, but he's certainly a more evolved version of one.

...just keep in mind that you could be this guy.  Read all his status updates.  Not to mention the fact that he straight up looks like a serial killer by anyone's standards.  And he is far from the only one.  There is one person in particular that I'm thinking of whose life I follow here and there via blog postings when I'm feeling REALLY down on myself purely because their life is so completely made of suck, but I can't say who they are because they are my friend on LiveJournal.  :)  Their life is one of the most pathetic things that's ever managed to gain internet access.  No reflection on you personally from me, of course...you're quite nice to me.  <3  /pet

What I really wanna talk about is boys and sex and general physical/emotional starvation and the willpower that it all requires to keep in balance, but I'm sick to death of the subject even though it's my own life I'm talking about so I can hardly imagine how trite it must seem to all of you by now.  Therefore I'll skip it until there's a major development worth discussing.

Also, thanks to the people who have sent me books off my wishlist lately.  Books keep me sane.  However, Amazon doesn't always tell me who the hell the sender is and if they do it's usually just the name so I've no idea who to say thank you to.  If you're sending me stuff then I assume you read my blog and will see this and know who you are.  So thank you.

I'm cutting my hair off.  I can't hack growing it long, I hate it and then when it gets long enough I just leave it in a ponytail 24/7 like a rocker dude anyway.  Not entirely sure what I'll do it it...an updated version of an A-line bob, probably.

I need to find a stylist that won't try to bouffant me.  They LOVE to make my hair big because my hair is all shiny and megapornstar if I don't flatiron it.  Angles, straight lines, jagged edges!  Gimme goth hair or give me death.

Suggestions, local people?